Happy Halloween!!!

Calling It Out and Keeping It Real

Note: The following blog is not the happy-go-lucky typical blog I may normally post, it is raw and for me, something I needed to write about. It is life, it is a window into a dark sub-part of my extended family. You have been officially warned...

I have a drug addict in my family.

Many family members of mine would be upset to know I just typed that last line, they still may if they read this blog. Oh well, one thing I have always been is outspoken and I will call it as I see it.

When I see a person get sent to rehad more than three times, follow the same patterns as they did before, steal, cheat and lie, and expect the rest of the family to support them, my patience runs a tad thin one may say.

This morning, I was drinking my tea, reading the Denver news like I usually do and I saw an article that sparked my interest. A headline about a meth bust. I opened it and in the list of people arrested, I see my niece’s name.

Lovely

Just a couple of weeks ago she sat near me at my sisters wedding, this is the same girl who I as there when she was born and at one point I would do anything for this child. As I sat next to this shell of a person, I realized the vibrant young, beautiful girl was gone, I was sitting next to an empty shell of a drug addict wearing a pretty dress.

My sister lived at home until my niece was 3 years old, being I was a young teenager it was my responsibility to be her in-home babysitter. As she got older and started experimenting with drugs, I was still able to talk to her. I felt like we had a good connection and she told me things she didn’t trust to anyone else. We had good conversations and she promised me she would never do anything but experiment. I guess I held onto false hope. Like I had always known, never trust a junkie. Little did I know at the time she was just that. I have known many addicts in my life and I have a low tolerance for them. The first time she went to rehab I held onto some hope she would come home cured, or at least able to be a contributing member of society. What I learned was she came home to fall into her same habits, manipulate the same people and thrive off the enabling that surrounds her.

One of the hardest things I have ever done was to practice ‘tough love’ on someone I love so dearly. I was there the moment she came into this world, in fact she is the only birth I have ever experienced. It is hard to look at someone you care so deeply, at one time thought you would carry the world on your shoulders for them, and in your mind say “I can not and will not help this person”.

I don’t really know why I felt the need to blog about this, I guess to feel some catharsis about the whole ugly situation, to hope through my frustration and writing something will change. These are changes I have no control over. All I can do is be thankful this person is in jail and safe from themselves for the time being and hope that someday they will find the strength in themselves to change their life. Until them I will continue with my own, be thankful I am removed from the situation by proximity and keep my family in my thoughts that they also have the strength to realize they too can not make this person change.

Election Humor

The best reference yet to John McCain and Sarah Palin:

“John McBush and Bible Spice”

Girlfriends Get-A-Way

This weekend I got the opportunity to reconnect with some old girlfriends. These are girls I have not seen since I was 18 years old, *ahem* eighteen or so years ago. LL, AGM and I decided to meet up in Keystone, thanks to LL arranging a condo rental.

It was fun to get together and catch up. Unfortunately I was too busy talking, eating, and drinking to take any pictures. I am kicking myself now.

It is so fun to see and listen to the stories our lives have taken us all. None of us got too far away, but far enough from our hometown to create our new lives with the tools we all received during the times we spent together last. We have discovered selves that are not defined by the high school we went to, the clothes we wore, the neighborhood we lived in or the people we hung out with. We are now the people we decided to become. What an amazing thing.

I have always been a believer that we make impacts on everyone’s lives we touch, and many times we never learn, or even know for that matter the impact we made.

I am lucky that I have the most amazing friends in my life, both from my childhood, and all through my adulthood so far.

As for my impact on my friends? My claim to fame I learned this weekend, Sautéed Honey Nut Cheerios. The legend lives on. Who would have guessed an afternoon culinary experiment in my parents kitchen when I was 12 years old would be the thing that another girlfriend remembers most, and now serve to their children. AWESOME!!!

Time to fry up some Cheerios...

Mi Hermano

Here is my brother, aka: Todd, The other T, and sometimes we refer to each other as our twin.

Even though there is a 4 year, one week and one day age difference, (I’m older) he is definitely the more mature one. You can tell here with his family. His wife Susan, and his beautiful daughters Natalie and Hailey. I know I am biased since I am their aunt but I think they are two of the most amazing short people I have ever met. Of course next to my nephews Colton and Wyatt…

Natalie is the oldest and practically the splitting image of me. She has my personality to a T. Notice how she is pushing away from her parents in this picture? She has some adventuring to do and this photograph is taking too much of her time. My brother agrees there are times he sees her do something that he swears it is his sister in smaller from. Hailey is the miniature version of her mother Susan. Hailey is determined to do anything her older sister does and is constantly observing and taking in everything around her.

This past weekend I got to spend time with my nieces at my sisters wedding. We had a fabulous time and there was many crack up moments, like ‘they’ say, kids do tend to say the darndest things.

When I first pulled up to the hotel in Estes Park, I passed my brother and his family in their car. I was told later that Natalie saw my car and announced “there goes Aunt T, she is going to her hotel room to get all fancy”. On the day we left after I gave both girls hugs and kisses good bye, as I walked away to my car, Natalie announced that I had to leave, I was going to Australia. Boy don’t I wish!

Hailey on the other hand is more of the quiet type. She doesn’t talk much but observes everything. During our visit, she developed a small crush on E. When we left on Saturday she stood at the hotel front door and pressed her face against the glass saying “goodbye E”…

Like an old friend once told me… “there is no greater feeling in the world than be loved by a child”

Geranium!

With the threat of our first freeze looming around the corner I decided to bring my geranium in for the winter.

I remember last winter when my grandmother passed away in December, in her basement we found her geraniums, they were the same three she had since I can remember. She brought them into her basement in the winter, they would shrivel up, and come spring they would pop back to life on her porch.

This year for Mothers day my step-mother gave me a gorgeous red geranium that flourished in my huge pot on my patio.

Here is the ‘before’ picture…



Come back next Spring for the after…I am sure it won’t be as pretty…I just hope I can keep it alive.

What The ...?!?!

Things that make you say “WHAT THE…”

The other day I was driving down the street. I passed a catholic church and looked to my left and saw this…



I took a double take, drove around the block to take a picture and it was still there. The only thing I could find out is it was a protester and on the back of the “priest’s” cloak was “Pope Grope”

Uh, okay…

“If you don’t vote you can’t bitch”

That has always been the saying my parents raised me with and I have taken to heart in my adult life. Voting has always been a big deal to me, I specifically remember going to register to vote on my 18th birthday. It is a big deal to me. My grandmother told me stories of when women were not allowed to vote. She came of voting age right around the time the 19th amendment was passed.

I have never been one to push others to vote. I just repeat my voting mantra. A while ago, in a political debate with a person close to me who will remain anonymous, they told me they never voted.

”What?!?! Are you f’ing kidding me?” I thought in my head, maybe with a few more adjectives, but only expressed the “What?!?!” part verbally. Maybe a little more was expressed, however I kept the expletives to myself.

I then stated: “If you don’t vote you can’t bitch”—the debate was ended, in my mind, I won.

Yesterday they registered to vote. Without any provoking from me.

Bring on the political debates, although we have very similar political views so the debates are more Political discussions…

Today is the deadline in Colorado to register to vote. Just a friendly reminder…

Rough

It has been a rough week.

Yesturday I had to say goodbye to a close friend that passed away suddenly.

I have a lot to report on, the fall colors, E and I's weekend in Durango, my sisters wedding and a final farewell to my friend Kelly.

I'll post some of these things when I am feeling a little more open and a little less drained and raw.

In the meantime, Enjoy a picture of my favorite baboshka kitty...



Bella, planning her attack on me when I least expect it...